careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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