I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
