why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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