I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Randomize
