you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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