did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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