Your dad touched me again.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
