Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize