id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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