And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
