i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
This house was built for laser tag.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
