Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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