You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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