1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
