He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
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