ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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