You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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