I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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