This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
where does the pee come out of this thing
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
