Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
