sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I just want nice things and good sex
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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