I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
