it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
