I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
