By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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