which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize