Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
