is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i will never coherently bang her
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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