It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
how does that bad decision feel?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
