HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
