i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Randomize
