worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize