He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
