How'd it feel making her break her religion?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
