I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
