I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Houston, we have a squirter
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Randomize
