Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize
