i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize