I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
