did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
