It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
The power of my boobs compel you
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
