So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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