If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
