Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
