He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
