Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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