can we get nightvision for the apartment?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
porn star boner night. come get it.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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