So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
