the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
