girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize